This weekend, I did something I’ve been wanting to do for a while,  I got a really short hair cut. I’ve been wanting to do this but maybe because of judgment and not wanting to part with my hair, etc.., I never did. While I was in Texas, I woke up one day and I just wanted to get it done.  So, I had to come up with a plan: find the right salon since I feel like I’m still fairly new to the DMV area, research on if they could work on my natural hair and then book the appointment.  I can be indecisive at times so sometimes it really does take a plan that I write down for things to get move forward. What usually works for you when you need to get things done?

A funny thing as I was preparing for this day, I almost talked myself out of it. Do you know I went back and forth in my bathroom mirror checking out if my hair was long enough to get this cut? Another thing as I was there, I kept saying in my head, my hairstylist and shampoo people will notice this area of my hair that I’ve had breakage, so I know I can’t get this cut. Almost stopped myself from making this big change because of these ruminating thoughts.  The games we allow our mind to play on us when we are trying to progress. SMH

See How Our Mind Plays Tricks on Us

Our own mind and the thoughts we allow it to create can have us really stagnant at times. This can limit our growth and make us feel that not getting out of our comfort zone is how we should live. Sometimes we have it so wrong and its knowing how much control we really have over these thoughts. We have the power to take control but it starts with our belief system. If we don’t believe in all the great qualities about self, how can we manage the thoughts in our head because they’re part of what we believe in ourself. To believe something is for us and we are meant to change to see this, its reshaping how we think. Even though the thoughts I had were strong, I wasn’t going to let it stop my plan.

That’s how we should think about moments where we can’t quiet down our thoughts, finding a motivating factor to still move towards our plan.  We may notice that certain self-defeating thoughts arise during times when we’re overwhelmed or just trying to change something in our life. To calm these thoughts down a few things to try.

 Quieting Down our Self-Defeating Thoughts Requires a Belief In You

• Figure out a way to talk back to these thoughts, think about a more rational thought you can come up with.
• Find out what is triggering this self-defeating thought and work through how to deal with the core issue
• Take a time-out for yourself and switch to a different activity for 30 minutes or so or maybe problem-solve a way to change how you’re thinking about the situation. You can only come back to the thought you’re having once you figure out some type of solution
• Try to do the opposite in this moment, talk nicer to yourself in this moment and think about all the reasons why you should go through with something. You’ve done some great things thus far, this isn’t a time to take away the progress you have made. Look at all the new things you forced yourself to do in your life, this is another time to push through.
• Partake in a guided imagery technique to get you out of your head and into a scene that is relaxing and hopefully can clear your mind.
• Chew some gum, there’s been research on how doing this can be relaxing so maybe take it a bit further and I think focusing on chewing in the moment, gets you out of your head for a brief moment.

You can do this, you have it in you, so what strength will you pull out to get past these thoughts?

Thanks for reading

Alvie