Changing our behaviors can be such a challenge. This thought popped up in my head yesterday but it’s also something that I feel is a constant discussion when counseling some of my clients.
There is a tendency to stay stagnant and fearful of what we can become. We can get comfortable in our current and past stories that we’d rather let that be who we are. Instead of trying to rid yourself of things that no longer work for you, you’d rather stay in certain moments doing the things you’re used to. Then we question, why we are still in the same boat, we question why we don’t see a change, we question why there’s still a continuous cycle and just question why the same things keep happening to us. It all starts with YOU.
Our behaviors can be maladaptive at times and can really affect how we change. If you’re used to coping with an issue by constantly doing this one thing, over time you see that, that coping mechanism you’re using, really isn’t working because you’re back to square one. We implement certain behaviors to escape our realities and one day, it may come a time when you can’t escape anymore and you have to face it. How will you do that with your old way of coping?
Maladaptive behaviors are behaviors that inhibit ones ability to adjust in certain situations. You just become so used to a certain behavior that you don’t fully become invested on the proper way to handle certain issues/concerns. We live in this state of constantly running away from our problems that, that becomes the norm.
The key thing I want you take from this is, just like it took time to learn certain behaviors, it will take time to unlearn them. There is a cycle of change that needs to happen and its about consistency. Change your usual approach, change how you think about situations, change how you react in those situations, then repeat until it sticks. Your brain can rewire a new path where these new behaviors become automatic, you just to be patient and let things happen in due time. Be mindful of your progress daily and stick to baby steps. You will get there but be kind and patient to yourself in the process.
Have a great weekend